Last night Ashley was really busy and she didn’t have time to talk to her friend Jamie. She knew Jamie would call so she asked Marriam to tell her that she can’t come to the phone. So Jamie calls, and I tell Marriam to tell Jamie that Ashley can’t come to the phone because Ashley isn’t feeling well, she has diarrhea. Marriam started giggling, she couldn’t say that to Jamie. So I took the phone and I started telling Jamie, “Jamie, you know how I cook really spicy foods now and then? Well Ashley tried something I made and she’s not feeling well at all. In fact, she got diarrhea and she’s in the washroom right now.” At this point Ashley had overheard me and started chasing me. I ran upstairs and stood behind Ashley’s door. Jamie then asks what’s all the yelling. I tell Jamie, “Yeah, it’s really bad Jamie, Ashley’s not doing well at all… what you’re hearing is Ashley in the washroom”. Then I finally let Ashley in, I was out of material. She takes the phone away and tells her friend Jamie she hates her roommates.

Don’t worry, Ashley and Marriam thought it was super funny and no one’s feelings got hurt. Keri was in the forest.

What is the purpose of tradition? Those who adhere to tradition say that is the result of years of experience. We are taught that true great minds are free-thinkers. They question and explore, challenge and pursue the old idealogies constantly to find truer knowledge.

I saw ABC Nightline last night. It was about Azhar Usman, an American Muslim Comedian. When I saw him and heard his story I saw a man who’s challenging tradition and who in my opinion has found a better way. He’s a lawyer. His wife is too. Through comedy, he has found an art form that allows him to project the ills of our society and encourage dialogue about them. He is in a lonely position I fear, I could tell he’s constantly having to defend his opinions and life choices. I hope he keeps it up though. He’s doing a wonderful job.

I hope it encourages others to think out of the box.

Do you think there is a direct correlation between high density cow regions and redneckism? What if cows release some sort of hormone that sets humans to be suspicious of those not within direct family or those we haven’t known all of our lives. Back in the day, those who milked cows were exposed to cowpox and therefore were immune to the deadly small pox. Also, women constantly release hormones that trigger other women to harmonize on the same menstrual cycle in a given local. So what if cows release some sort of something or another too?

There’s nothing sure in life except death. Even that’s a little fuzzy because you don’t know when. Life is just probabilities. It’s not always fair. Sometimes it’s damn unfair. Some people have it so easy. Anything they dream of is within their reach. The probability of any given success in their life is higher than if you scraped your ass in hard work trying to get there. In the end all you can do is try. If I work hard and don’t give up the probability of success will be higher. Whether it actually materializes is up to God though. All I can do is try.

How many people want to be doctors? Floods of students who work their butts off trying to get in. You cannot say that those that didn’t get in didn’t try or unworthy in any way. They tried honey. Just because someone does not attain success doesn’t mean that they didn’t try. Sure, some students could have tried harder, they could have increased their probabilities. But it’s never a level playing field. No one goes through the exact same path in life. Some paths are paved smooth, some paths are long, some are short, some are ridden with dead ends and some paths lead us to a destination different than the one we were seeking. Pray, perservere and have patience. Hopefully you’ll have some success in your life. All you can do is increase your probabilities by trying. The rest is up to God.

I’ve finally realized I cannot force anything to happen. I can just try. It’s scary. I feel helpless but at the same time I feel like a huge load has been lifted from my shoulders. Before, I felt my failures were due to a lack of passion, determination, conviction and a lack of discipline. Now I feel like I am only responsible for increasing the probabilities. Not for the actual act itself. Don’t get me wrong, I’ll still feel bad when things crap out and the shit really hits the industrial-sized fan. I can only try and find comfort in knowing I tried my best.

Staying up and just hanging out w/ friends etc. is easy. Staying up to get work done is exhausting. These are things that I’ve done in the past that have helped

1.hide the clock:
time doesnt really matter, you need to get sth done, watching the clock and playing the “ok, i can get x hours of sleep” just stresses me out personally.

2. short bursts of exercise:
just to keep the blood pumping and me from nodding off

3. log off msn / chat / avoid distractions:
the sooner you’re done the sooner you will be in cool sheets, fluffy pillows and loving blankie

4. cool refreshing water
coffee makes my stomach bite, coke/pepsi makes my teeth furry, i prefer cold crisp water